yes, only the void remains /
how can i explain that
we're now zombies
or at the very least,
we're definitely deceased?
how will i relate our defeat
to the dreams of the
children we will never have?
been at my pad,
guzzling Novocain
for at least three weeks
and my peace has yet
to peek; half of me still feels,
so i turn the knob to raise
the temperature but none
of this seems real / but still,
i'll hold
onto the present pain
like it has some sort of
appeal / today, i said your
name aloud for the first time
in awhile / i remember when
something as simple as that
would have easily spread
a smile, on my face /
but i know now that
you see what we once
called "love," as fake /
ironic trying to find solace
listening to women sing
about complicit composites,
reminding
me repeatedly
of how much we suck /
i took a snapshot of
your screen and its been
streaming to me like a brook
or a dream and now,
i'm stuck / between caring
too much and pretending
to give ninety-nine minus
a hunnit fucks but it's probably
for the best that we consciously
un-cuffed / yet, i haven't let go,
your absence was tipping
of the first domino,
now it's gravity's show,
and i'm just trying to stay
on my toes, feeling like
my eyes closed...
falling to my knees
like i am in mourning /
...

how long does it take
to heal a heartbreak?
i need to let go of the
heartache but i'm still
plagued by the weight
and being haunted
in the present by the stakes
of the last time / we don't
require a judge to feel guilty
in the wake
of love crimes /
and i don't know if this path
is divine or designed or better
yet if its been maligned
by my hands /
i think love is the destination
in many dreams but things
ain't go how we planned /
or maybe our failure,
was the result of not planning
at all / i believe that
the best of us tend to lose
our wits when
we fall, trying to right ourselves
in midair, imagining being
able to fly and glide through
these years but too often
when we attempt to
pair, we just collide
and crash
and burn / how many
times can we die through
Phoenix eyes before
we learn? maybe "us"
is not meant to be /
but we've been
through the fire
and the mire so many
times it's hard not to
fight the signs that we've
seen, in order to levitate
the promise that our parents
weren't able to see /